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Kiley's Infertility Journey

☀️ CLICK HERE TO BUY THE BEST SOCKS ON THE PLANET TO HELP WOMEN WITH INFERTILITY! A portion of every single sale will go to an incredible woman experiencing infertility. They make the BEST gifts for women experiencing infertility to remind them they are loved OR to wear to your own appointments while working hard to grow your family to remind you that you have this community of women linking arms with you. You are incredible, sister!

CLICK HERE to join our safe, private Facebook group to meet other incredible women who are walking your path. ☀️

Read Kiley's Story here:

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My husband Jordan & I were trying to conceive for 18 months before starting IVF. We have a beautiful, healthy 6 month old daughter that resulted from our first round of IVF with a fresh embryo. We hope to do a frozen embryo transfer later on this year so that our babies can be about 2 years apart. 

I am a big planner. I love to know what is happening and when. The biggest part of infertility was that it didn’t fit into either category. It was completely out of my control. Through this process, I’ve learned you have to BE YOUR OWN ADVOCATE. It is OK to jump around and find doctors that you can work with and that are proactive in finding out how to help you. There are several occasions that come to mind, but I had to stand up for our future family even with our fertility specialist. I requested we skip the usual 3 IUI treatment and go straight to IVF. Long story short, as we were going through IVF I specifically remember her saying “with these test results, IUI would not have worked for you as a couple. I’m glad you’ve started this IVF cycle.” 

Through the process, I cycled through the stages of grief several times, and I allowed myself to do so instead of stuffing things back. It was difficult because my husband wanted children, but didn’t understand the feeling of “loss” month after month. It felt like my body was failing me, but I was already doing as much as I could. During the process, it is easy to blame yourself. I would evaluate what I was doing, and felt my husband and I were living a good life -- so why couldn’t we become parents? We relied much more on our Heavenly Father (our religion) during that time. 

The best thing I did in this trial was to reach out to others struggling with infertility. There is a huge community online that I am so grateful I found. I was so surprised by how many people in my area were struggling. 

Wanting to grow (or start) your family and not be able to is the hardest pain I have felt in my life. There is such bittersweet pain in watching others get pregnant and have babies. It’s a fine line -- you’re not upset with them for having children. In fact, you are so happy for them! But there is an inner battle between sharing your happiness for them while mourning yet another negative test or failed treatment in your life. You put your life on hold for hope that maybe this month the test will be positive or because you’ll be in treatment so you think you can’t possibly take that trip. 

I truly believe we go through trials and hardships so that we can share with others. I remember finding Instagram influencers with fertility struggles and having Young Women leaders in high school struggle and then when we crossed that bridge, I realized why those people were placed in my life. I hope to be that light to others starting out or in the middle of their journey.  I have tried my best to be open with as many people about our experience. We are so grateful for our daughter, but I think one of the hardest things for me right now in this phase (of not currently trying to have another baby, but knowing the challenge lies ahead) is some sort of “survivor’s guilt.”  It’s been hard to see and support friends that have been trying to conceive much longer than we have, or have done more rounds of IVF than we did and still haven’t had success. It is hard and I have even felt selfish for saying we want to try for another baby this year before they even have their first. Luckily, I have great friends who, even in their own struggle, support me too. I am so humbled and grateful for the infertility community. It has truly changed my life. And those months of pregnancy and moments of becoming a parent are worth the years of waiting. She has filled the huge holes in our hearts.

Life update- We’re expecting another little girl in the spring! She’s the result of a FET, we transferred 2 embryos and got this strong little one.

Instagram: @Kileystearns

☀️ CLICK HERE TO BUY THE BEST SOCKS ON THE PLANET TO HELP WOMEN WITH INFERTILITY! A portion of every single sale will go to an incredible woman experiencing infertility. They make the BEST gifts for women experiencing infertility to remind them they are loved OR to wear to your own appointments while working hard to grow your family to remind you that you have this community of women linking arms with you. You are incredible, sister!

CLICK HERE to join our safe, private Facebook group to meet other incredible women who are walking your path. ☀️

 

To read Rachel Beiting's Infertility journey, click HERE.

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